Acknowledging People Is SO Much Work!

Several of the executives were hanging around in my office the other day, debating what to do about a particular employee. Not that someone was in trouble. Rather, this person had performed an outstanding accomplishment, one which had a substantial impact on our bottom line. They were discussing how best to acknowledge it. A special luncheon in her honor? A handwritten letter from the President? A big “thank you” message written in the sky?

We decided the best thing to do was for her manager to sit down with her, face to face, eye to eye, heart to heart, and simply tell her what a great job she had done. Come to think of it, we should probably be doing this all the time anyways, with each other and all of our people whenever we catch them doing a good job, large or small.

“Everyone wants to be acknowledged,” I offered, “even us, the execs.” They nodded heartily in agreement. Just because someone is a big-shot leader doesn’t mean they don’t need the soul-rush of a good pat on the back once in a while, or an earnest gesture of appreciation. I don’t care who you are, or what your position is, it’s nice to be recognized for the good work you are doing. And chances are, that acknowledgement in turn makes you more likely to give recognition to others, creating a virtuous cycle of “Good Work!”

The group then dispersed, back to their routines and responsibilities and headaches, promptly getting caught up in the details of some imminent project, and, in all likelihood, forgetting all about our inspirational conversation.

Not ten minutes later, I received a call from the Chairman of the Board of Directors of a company which I serve on.

“I’m just calling to thank you for being on our Board and to tell you what a great job you are doing,” he said.

“Oh,” I replied, somewhat flustered, uncertain of what to say. “Well. Thanks.”

I didn’t think my personal contribution to the Board was such a big deal. I hesitated for a second, wondering what he was really calling me for. An update? Some corporate gossip? An urgent concern?

“There’s nothing else,” he continued. “I just wanted to tell you that. We really appreciate having your gray matter in the room with us.”

Since my wife is a Psychologist, I knew right away that “gray matter” refers to my brain. Good thing, though.

With that, he said goodbye and we hung up.

This was odd, the timing, coming just minutes after that discussion in my office. I imagined him, this seasoned Board chairman, driving his car down the highway on his way to some important meeting, and then having the mindfulness, the will and thoughtfulness to actually make the call and say what he said. He was very intentional about it.

So why does acknowledging people always seem like such an ordeal in my own mind?

We’re all extremely busy and important people, and I know, I know, it takes such a huge effort to pick up the phone and dial those ten numbers — or one number, if it’s on speed dial — or to get out of your chair and mobilize your legs, moving one heavy foot in front of the other, to walk all the way down the hall into someone’s office, and then to have to move your lips like that and activate your vocal chords, all of which to say,

“Good job. I appreciate you.”

Whew! It’s so much work!

So we forget. We procrastinate. We’re lazy about these softer things. We need constant reminders, like someone calling out of the blue to exemplify the point immediately following a discussion about it.

You know, sometimes God sends these signals that are really hard to miss. He might as well have written me a message in the sky.

Post by J.B. Wood. Image by DC Central Kitchen. Used with permission. Sourced via Flickr.